Need To Feel Better About Your Life Choices? Well, A Man Glued Himself To A Bank Door

Sarah Kester
Sticky glue
Unsplash | Scott Sanker

One BC man is in a real sticky situation. He was banned from having glue outside his home after he glued himself to a Royal Bank of Canada door as part of a protest.

If he wants to use glue outside of his home, he must get permission from his probation officer. We’ve heard about guns being banned and travel restrictions, but never glue!

If you thought a man banned from glue was weird, check out these other wacky headlines.

Wacky news article
Buzzfeed | Huffington Post

Well, isn't this just ironic?! The one who needed to eat a Snickers bar was the woman in the sumo suit (??). She clearly wasn't herself.

You can't make this stuff up, people.

Article about drunk woman stealing ferry
9gag | 9gag

Admit it: you laughed when you saw this. How could you not?! It's a drunk woman (likely from rum) saying one of Disney's most famous lines while pulling the ultimate heist. We have a feeling Jack would be proud.

Wait, what?

News story about man punching cat |

This one is so confusing, it almost reads like it's two news stories. When we're mad about slow internet, we call the internet company. We don't throw a cat out the window and punch a woman in one fell swoop!

Honorable mention: Kendall Jenner's Pepsi ad.

Kendall's Pepsi ad
The Hollywood Reporter | The Hollywood Reporter

In the viral commercial dubbed “tone-deaf,” the model stopped a bad protest by handing a police officer a Pepsi can. Oh, if only it were that easy. 

This next strange story is also about a protest. Although, instead of a can of soda, a man used glue.

Victor Lawrence Brice pleaded guilty to two charges that were in connection to protests earlier this year. 

Kelso saying "Not glued, super glued."

January 27 was pretty standard as far as protests go. Climate activists from the Extinction Rebellion-affiliated protested on the Trans Canada Highway near Nanaimo, BC.

But on April 7, things got a little sticky at a Royal Bank branch. 

Bank vault
Unsplash | Brock Wegner

The climate activist glued himself to a bank door. "I am not sure if the protestors gluing themselves to the door at the bank is unique or not,” the judge said in the court documents. 

“It is certainly something I have not heard of, but it would certainly be an effective way of protest or at least causing disruption at the bank.”

Dwight using glue on box

Since the judge factored in Victor’s concern for climate change and his “highly productive and model citizenship," as a pharmacist for 34 years, he was granted a conditional discharge.

In the end, he was sentenced to 12 months of probation and 40 hours of community service. 

Glue stick
Unsplash | charlesdeluvio

He isn’t allowed to go to the Royal Bank of Canada, which is located in the town of Nanaimo, BC, Canada.

Finally, he was banned from possessing “any glue, Super Glue, adhesive, fixative, or resin” outside of his home without permission from his probation officer.

Woman with glue stuck to finger
Giphy | Rosanna Pansino

So long, arts and crafts projects! Another exception is if it is "glue, adhesive, fixative or resin which normally would be used by or with children.” 

"You must carry the permission if you have one from the probation office with you, which may be in electronic format, when you possess any of these items outside your residence," the judge said, as a term of his probation.

Unsplash | Tingey Injury Law Firm

Once the story went viral online, many jokes were made.

"I wonder if the decision will stick," wrote one Twitter user.

"Hmmm can we get a similar ruling involving 1) Tiki Torches 2) Transport Truck?" another joked. One even suggested that they left Victor on the door, especially in January.

H/T: Global