Men Share The Things Rom Coms Need To Stop Expecting Them To Do In Real Life

Ashley Hunte
A single, pink rose.
Unsplash | Tirza van Dijk

A good rom-com might be somewhat of a guilty pleasure for most of us, but we can all at least agree that we don't expect the kinds of tropes we see in the movies, in real life. Right?

Well, the men of Reddit decided to set the record straight. They had plenty to say when asked, "Men, what is something women have seen in rom coms that you wish they would stop expecting you to do in real life?"

"Stop expecting us to have super-cute, adventurous, or exotic jobs."

man standing at the edge of a waterfall
Unsplash | didin emelu

"Vets work a lot and can't take time off during the day. Mechanics and construction workers are smelly, dirty, and work long hours and may not make a ton of money. Investment bankers and lawyers are generally dicks. A lot of normal guys have normal, boring jobs, but HEY WE STILL HAVE JOBS AND MAKE DECENT MONEY!"

"Surprise vacations/travel Doesn't need further explanation."

passports held up against the sky by tourists
Unsplash | Spencer Davis

One commenter joked, "'Hey honey I'm taking you on a surprise vacation, you just have to give your job 2 minutes notice that you won't be in!'"

That about sums it up, I think.

"Kiss her hanging upside down in the rain. Come on."

The upside down kiss scene from Spider-Man (2002).

Technically not from a rom-com, but still pretty applicable. Like, there's no way that's actually all that comfortable, right? And the rain factor probably makes it even worse.

"Waiting 3 days for a text. That thing is old now."

A group of people surrounding Mindy Kaling as she holds her phone.
Giphy | HULU

If I have to sit through one more rom-com where the best friend talks about the unwritten "rule" of waiting a million years before texting back, I'm gonna lose it. No man, woman, or anyone else likes this!

"Be charming and attractive despite my many objective faults."

Ryan Reynolds rolling his eyes dramatically.

"Movie: can't get his life together, kind of a dick, but is Matthew McConaughey.

"Real life: better get our lives together and not be such a dick, 'cause we don't look like Matthew McConaughey."

"Also- hide secret talents that make us more attractive after we've known you for a while."

Two men jumping on a giant piano keyboard as a crowd watches.
Giphy | 20th Century Fox Home Entertainment

"If I could sing real good, our first date would be a karaoke bar, I wouldn't save that [expletive] for after you thought I was gonna take that promotion across the country and sing for you at your sister's wedding."

"Believing that I'm not going to give up pursuing you after you reject me once."

A woman holding u0p multiple cards that each say "no" on them.
Giphy | HULU

I swear, everyone has an older relative who met their significant other because one was relentlessly pursuing the other. I don't think anyone in this day and age has the patience for that anymore. Or the lack of respect for boundaries.

"Expecting me to abstractly put myself below her in the relationship. As if I'm the replaceable one that's 'punching up,' and boy 'how did I ever get her.'"

Homer Simpson extending both his hands out and saying, "That's right, the odd couple!"

Yeah, that's one trope that needs to die. It's kind of weird how rom-coms perpetuate the idea of a couple where the woman is supposed to be out of the man's league.

"The whole hard to get thing pisses me off... if you are interested, say yes, if not, say no... I am not telepathic..."

A guy holding two shirts and saying, "playing hard to get."
Giphy | wtFOCK

This goes for everyone who dates. The world would be a much better place if people were upfront about their expectations.

But rom-coms wouldn't be nearly as interesting, so...

"Stop 'testing' people to see if they actually love you."

Julia Louis-Dreyfus saying, "This was a test, folks and you all failed."
Giphy | Veep HBO

There are people out there who seriously treat their relationships as games. Instead of as... relationships. With people. Who have feelings. Because I guess that's too much to ask for?

"Almost everything done in rom coms is creepy in real life. Especially persistence."

Bella and Edward from Twilight laying in grass.
Giphy | Lionsgate Home Entertainment

Knowing that a lot of the plots and tropes we see in romance movies/books can't actually happen in real life is a tough pill to swallow. But hey, that's why it's called fiction.

"Confess your feelings to someone already in a relationship."

A man looking to his left and saying "I'm in love with you."
Giphy | Channel 7

"It seems like a lot of movies I have seen make this seem like the honorable thing to do for some reason, but I've never seen it work out irl."

To be honest, it sounds like a horrible idea.

"Your love/relationship 'saving/fixing' him."

A man dressed in black against a black background, holding a single red rose.
Giphy | After Movie

"Even if you could fix Broody McBadboy, then he would lose all of his allure and become just another stable guy. I don't understand why this even exists."

And yet, there's a huge market for those kinds of stories.

"Run through airport security, dodging the security guys, to make a last minute declaration of love before her plane leaves."

A man unloading all his luggage on the ground to start running.
Giphy | TLC Europe

So many movies have these romantic scenes, and they leave you wondering how these dudes didn't get arrested by airport security.

"Rom coms perpetuate this idea that cheating on men is perfectly fine just as long as the woman is making some choice who she loves most."

A man asking a woman, "Have you been cheating on me?"
Giphy | Empire FOX

"That's some seriously entitled, self-centred and sociopathic [expletive] that needs to stop."

"'Are you alright?' In a sad voice she'd say yes."

Claudette from The Room saying, "What's wrong? Tell me?"
Giphy | The Room

"So there's CLEARLY something wrong and there's absolutely no way of me knowing what. And she'll never tell me what's wrong. Please. Just do. It pains me when there's something wrong and you don't tell me."

"The ridiculously lavish lifestyles and impossible jobs these people have."

A woman looking to her right and saying, "you're like a rom-com character."
Giphy | Proven Innocent

"No one is living in a 4000 square foot mansion in Santa Barbara working as a flower shop owner who only works 2 hours a week so the rest of her time can be available for romantic misunderstandings."

"Throwing a childish hissy fit and expecting the guy to pamper you back into a good mood."

Anne Hathaway in a wedding dress, throwing a bouquet down and yelling in rage.

Sounds like the kind of selfish, manipulative behavior that wouldn't even be fun to watch. Hard to believe people like that exist.

"If you say 'just go' and walk away, he will never turn around and run after you."

shadow of a man waving good bye against a green wall
Unsplash | Ioana Cristiana

"He will never shout 'wait!' and run through pouring rain. He will slowly turn the car around and drive away and try to deal with his heartbreak. That [expletive] never gets someone to 'prove their love,' it just destroys relationships."

"Drop everything and save them from their own crappy decision-making."

A woman smiling with a mug that's edited to say, "Help me."
Giphy | Satisfied Customer

"People who need constant saving don't deserve anything from other people."

Once again, this just feels really selfish and manipulative. You can't just expect the world to revolve around you, you know.